Humor

Guess Who Got Sucked into Civ III Tonight?

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Yup, that’s right. So much for fanatical bloggers bringing you the finest in political entertainment, huh? (looking around quickly) Here: it’s the latest Dave Barry article about Edwards and bowling. Why did I pick this? Umm… it was on the Post-It note… lemme read…. right, because of this: As the crowd dispersed, I overheard this … Read more

Consider the Platypus.

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While I myself recognize the validity of the theory of evolution, I must admit that these people at UDN have some juice behind their theories, assuming of course that you believe in an deity that can’t help but fiddle with the squishy bits every so often. Personally, I like my Creator a bit more concentrating on the Big Picture and letting us get on with our lives, but that’s just me.

(This got sent to me by the atheistic physicist living in my basement. Excuse me, the atheistic physicist with a PhD living in my basement, thank you very much.)

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The Inevitable SotU Link.

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It’s time, once again, for the SotU drinking game. Useful additions welcome below: for the sake of balance, couple an cliche from the Other Side to drink to with a cliche from your own. (Also via Instapundit)

Arisia report

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Having a good time and a bad net connection, so I’ll just note this as an example of the kinds of materials that I’m being exposed to at the convention. No, nobody’s dared stage it as of yet, as far as I know.

Fafblog in Crisis!

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An Obsidian Wings World Exclusive!

The Fafblog is in crisis! As many of you know, the Fafblog — my only source for traffic information, agribusiness news, and manna — consists of Fafnir, Giblets, and The Medium Lobster. Last week, Fafnir announced that the Fafblog would endorse Howard Dean for President. Only Dean, said Fafnir, can “confront the katana-wielding shadow-warriors of mounting national debt, rising health care costs, the war on Iraq and the specter of international terrorism.”

Now, both Giblets and The Medium Lobster have dissented from the Fafblog’s endorsement!

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I Predict that No Woman Will Be Surprised…

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… to hear that a certain python recently reported as being the longest in the world didn’t, um, measure up to expectations. The truly sad part is that Reuters and I both thought up the bad joke independently of each other. Who should be more chagrined about this is still up in the air. (Via … Read more

Guess it’s over, then.

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Fafblog endorsed Dean. I’ll call up Bush and tell him the bad news; somebody else call the other eight Democratic candidates, ‘kay? I can’t trust myself to not crank call Kuchinich out of spite. (pause) On the bright side, the Ninja googlebomb lives on. UPDATE: mc_masterchef asks for haiku’s warp and woof – Let us … Read more

Alas…

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…while Fables of the Reconstruction has a link up to Bally’s Pain in the Butt (extremely mild) BDSM workout program (yes, kids, you too can combine alternative sexuality and improved cardiovascular activity!*), the Quicktime video won’t load properly on my site – making me actually interested now in seeing said video. Which is kind of … Read more

Hey, I have a blog: the blog doesn’t have me

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Via Normblog we find this little quiz: Are you a Blogoholic? I scored a mere 52%. I can give this up any time that I want. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go work out ways to get twenty more people to add this site to their blogrolls, start a meme and work … Read more

Thought-Resolution Experiment.

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Thanks to regular Tacitus poster Timmy the Wonder Dog I was alerted to this piece of Lileksian amusement. Amusing stuff… and, in the spirit of the holiday, we’re going to designate this as… THE NEW YEAR’S POLITICAL RESOLUTION THREAD!!!!! Right. Anyway, the rules are simple: 1) Come up with a political resolution that applies to … Read more

OK, maybe I’m just too tired

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…but this Dave Barry year in review thing got funnier the farther in I read. Equal-opportunity skewering galore. (via Peevish, which has also been belatedly blogrolled)

Mostly for one line

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Norm Geras linked to this article, which is worth noting for this paragraph alone: Therefore a cat with chicken tikka masala on its back will be certain to hover in mid air, while there could be problems with buttered toast as the toast may fall off the cat, causing a terrible monorail crash resulting in … Read more

Mean? Yes. Accurate? Hmmm: could be…

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Where Mike of Cold Fury got these transcripts, we’ll never know… but don’t let the rough language and unfair accusations made against our good, dear friends Germany, France and Khofi Annan distract you from the point. Said point will no doubt be transmogrified* in a fit of heavy-handed sarcasm by somebody, but, hey, it’s almost … Read more

What The Net Is Good For…

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…Yes, besides porn. Anyhoo, via the getting-attacked-from-both-sides-at-once Marxists over at SIAW, we are given a link to the Museum of Hoaxes, which is an “almost daily weblog about hoaxes, pranks, and practical jokes”. The ones I’ve seen so far have been pretty good, especially the Man Will Never Fly Society, a group of largely ex-military … Read more

(Pointing) Cow.*

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I know that I said that I was going for coffee, but this article from Dave Barry stopped me cold. I shall merely quote the passage that my long-suffering girlfriend quoted when she sent this to me:

“WISCONSIN –Weary National Guard troops continued to battle a rampaging herd of bacteria-enhanced Australian kangaroo cows that have been bounding around this heartland state, soaring over fences with moos of derision and punching their way into grain silos. ‘The worst thing,’ said one Guardsman, ‘is when they get airborne, and suddenly you’re facing a hailstorm of incoming meadow muffins. Although I have to say they don’t smell as bad as the local cows.’ ”

Also in the article… SUVs with machine guns! Somebody’s actually making them! It’ll be just like Car Wars! No, wait, that’s bad.

Anyway, read the whole thing, as He Who Almost No-One Is Neutral About would say.

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Follow up #2

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On a much lighter note, I would like to correct the following omissions to “Red Dawn of a Brighter Age“. Crionna reports that, “It wasn’t until 2010 that it was learned that in 2005’s “Operation Next Of Kin” George Bush snuck away from his ranch and went to New York to find the killers of … Read more

Red Dawn of a Brighter Age

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THE DECADE IN REVIEW: Swayze Inspired Troops, Saved America

12/31/09—WASHINGTON, D.C. Senior Defense Department officials agree that the turning point in the War on Terror came in December of 2003, with the capture of Saddam Hussein in “Operation Red Dawn.” The arrest and trial of the former dictator helped sap the morale of Iraqi guerillas. But as important as Hussein’s arrest was in Iraq’s transition to democracy, the real key was the name, which came from a 1984 Patrick Swayze film about young Americans fighting a guerilla war against Soviet invaders.

“It was sort of a joke at first,” said Undersecretary of Operational Nomenclature Stephen O’Connell. “We saw one of the posters in the elevator for the monthly viewing of “Red Dawn” in Secretary Rumsfeld’s rumpus room, and thought, hey, it’s as good a name as any.”

“A month later, when we were tipped off on the sighting of Mullah Omar in Kandahar, we joked that the name might have been a good luck charm, so we decided to call that one ‘Operation Steel Dawn.’ And after that mission’s success, it just sort of took on a life of its own,” O’Connell said.

Al Qaeda leader Abu Yasir was captured in “Operation Road House” in November of 2004. The intelligence gained from his interrogation led troops to bin Laden lieutenant Abu Muzaham in “Operation Point Break” in January 2005. Muzaham, in turn, gave the military the information it needed for “Operation Dirty Dancing“, which led to Osama bin Laden’s arrest in the mountains of Aghanistan that March.

Bin Laden’s capture accompanied a profound change in the Bush administration’s political fortunes. When news of the mission’s success hit the airwaves, Vice President Cheney was on Capitol Hill, answering questions under subpoena about his role in the ’04 Halliburton Scandal. Congressional Democrats had even called for Cheney’s resignation. But those calls quickly ended when President Bush marched into the Senate, and, with a cry of “Nobody puts Baby in a corner!”, carried Cheney on his soldiers to a triumphant joint press conference.

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I Have No Idea

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… I just felt like rewriting the beginning of the Prologue to Richard III. Hey, at least I didn’t call it “A Canticle For Lieberman”…

Moe

PS: Don’t read too much into this one, guys. The link to the text I used to mutate this found here. Also, rilkefan gets a golf clap for tracking it down so quickly.

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Fear my wrath…

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…for the last nicotine patch has fallen off, its body leeched of the hell’s brew that has kept me sane these last eight weeks. I can feel the last tendrils of it dissipating into fog, then mist, then vapors… and deep, deep below (where the gators of the id reside) sleeps a Thing uneasily. Fair … Read more

Yes, I have a Marxist site in my blogroll…

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…actually, I have two now, Norm Geras being the other. But any Marxist site with the wit to link favorably to Tim Blair is all right in my book, dammit (why Tim wasn’t also in my blogroll already, the world may never know)*. This is still all part of the Insidious Plan, though. I swear … Read more

The obligatory Catblogging Post…

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…only, I don’t have any actual cats. This was a bit of a concern, as apparently the ownership of a cat is necessary for both blogging and the writing of obscure roleplaying game material, and my lack of same was a bit problematical. I figured that either von or Katherine would have one, but they’ve … Read more

Well, It’s Official…

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…I must be a real live blogger and stuff, because I just had a dream where I blogged on the Medicare bill. Said dream came complete with a comments thread, trackbacks and a bit of drama where anonymous people were revealed to be other people; I woke up after people started to link to me … Read more

Bored Now…

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… I dunno, I was expecting something a bit more exciting so far from the English antiBush protestors. More in your face, more edgy and hip, more… well, people. However, I have been assured and reassured by those presumably in the know that Thursday’s demonstrations will be everything* that we’ve come to expect from the … Read more