Who You Calling a Dog?

by

hat tip to constant reader wilfred for this very entertaining diversion
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In the grand tradition of asking folks "If you were a tree, what kind would you be?" comes What Dog Are You (see link near bottom of right-hand column).

Apparently I’m a Newfoundland (a thin one, thank you):

A large and beautiful beast, the Newfoundland is rarely bad tempered unless provoked. Indeed it is amazingly docile amongst other breeds, one having been seen sitting quietly amongst a bunch of squabbling Chihauhuas.

So.tempting.must.resist.further.comment…

54 thoughts on “Who You Calling a Dog?”

  1. Saluki. I’ll take it.
    I love the responses to the ‘How [intelligent/lovable/x] are you?’ questions:
    1) High
    2) Above Average
    3) Average
    Humans are so predictable.

  2. I’m a dalmatian, which seems like an odd choice since they didn’t ask any questions that would have brought out one key difference: I am not good at very, very long runs, since I was not bred to run alongside carriages for long distances, and I do not get stir-crazy if I get less than several miles of running in a day.

  4. Well I rated out as a “Curly Coated Retreiver” which is more-or-less OK as I DO like to swim: although the “oily coat” characteristic did put me off a bit (after what I spend on conditioner?). Maybe I’d feel better if it was a breed I had ever heard of before…….

  7. Sidereal,
    I suspect a whole flock of environmentally ruffled pigeons are coming home to roost in Bush’s second term.
    I’m nearly salivating waiting to get my hands on Whitman’s book. Good review of it in the NYTimes today. Part that really, er, stuck in my claw:

    Christie Whitman emerged from her first meeting with President-elect George Bush in 2000 full of optimism and convinced of his determination to build a positive environmental “legacy” – a belief reinforced moments later when Karl Rove took her aside and confided, flatteringly, that as the boss of the Environmental Protection Agency, she would be one of just three cabinet-level officers who would help determine whether the president would be re-elected in 2004. This she took to mean that “the work I would do in building a strong record on the environment would help the president build on his base by attracting moderate voters.”
    “As it turned out,” she now concedes in her just-published political memoir, “It’s My Party Too,” “I don’t seem to have understood Karl correctly.”
    In fact, she misunderstood him completely. Why she did so is one of the many puzzles in this interesting but often disingenuous and frustrating book. A cursory check would have revealed that Mr. Rove had no use for environmentalists and, indeed, had long believed that Mr. Bush’s father lost the 1992 election partly because he was too squishy on environmental issues, offending the conservative base on which Mr. Rove pins his political strategy.
    Perhaps Ms. Whitman missed the signs because she wanted so much to believe that she could both help a president she very much admired and contribute to a cause that is important to her. Had she fully understood that, as it now appears, Mr. Rove wanted her on board to help provide cover for the easing of important environmental laws, she might never have taken the job at all.

    I’ll say it again: very rarely when I suspect the Administration of being up to no good does the truth reveal itself not to be much, much worse than I imagined.

  8. Hmmm, I’m a Xoloitzcuintli. Not that I knew such a beast existed. Also known as a Mexican Hairless. Damned male pattern baldness.

  10. Beagles are my very favorite breed of dog, CaseyL.
    They’re what I call a no-frills dog’s dog. Perfect in every dogness sort of way.

  11. Except they’re noisy as hell. We nearly got one but were turned off by the barking. Then almost got a Corgi, then realized cities aren’t really healthy places for dogs.
    When we get Our Place In The Country(tm) (Fall City, really. . kind of a hippy forest suburb), we’ll get dogs. I’ll add a Saluki to the list. Bedouin gazelle-hunting dogs! You can’t beat that.

  13. Another “Curly Coated Retreiver” here. Hmm. The oily bit is indeed a bit off-putting, but I did once swim fairly well (though it has been more than 12 years since I did so competively) — so that part kinda fits. I’ll live with it.

  14. Saluki.
    apparently i’m a member of an elegant if somewhat aloof breed, who is loyal, affectionate, trustworthy and well-sought after(!) I retain strong hunting instincts, so care should be taken when taking me to the countryside.
    Francis

  17. I’m apparently a Sloughi.
    I thought for sure I was a Border Collie. Ah well; I guess I’ll be setting those sheep free when I get home tonight.

  19. Why have I not even heard of most of these breeds of dog?
    What kind of high-flautin’, elist, New England Kennel Club pure-bred, no-mutts-need-apply sort of site are they running over there? I assumed I was exotic enough to be a Newfoundland and not let it insult my working class sensibilities, but really, short of the Beagle and Saint Bernard, I’ve never heard of these breeds….OK, so I’ve heard of Dalmatians as well, but only because of Disney…;-) Where are the Shepards, and Poodles, and Rotweilers, and Jack Russels?

  26. I’m an Alaskan Malamute.
    “Despite its wolfish appearance, this breed is gentle, affectionate, and loyal, with a long memory. Owners warn of a natural stubbornness which must be overcome by training.”
    They nailed me.
    I feel like I should go read my horoscope now, too…
    CS

  29. Irish Setter. Among other things, “needing plenty of exercise as well as regular grooming.” Sounds about right.

  30. Strangely appropriate: I’m a collie.

    Origin: UK. Can be either Rough or Smooth, depending on the cost. [Ahem.] Evolved from the same stock as other Scottish herding dogs, believed to be descendants of dogs accompanying Roman invaders 50 BC. Although some authorities claim that the breed was brought to Scotland from Iceland only 400 years ago. The Rough Collie was Introduced to England [hello, England!] in 1860 by Queen Victoria and seen in the county of Northumberland. It is thought that the name Collie derives from the black-faced sheep they drove. MGM made a star out of the Rough Collie in its role as Lassie.
    Personality: This breed makes an excellent guard, being naturally suspicious of strangers. It is supremely loyal and affectionate to its owners, a joy to train and usually reliable with children. Brilliant acting abilities.

    Ah well; I guess I’ll be setting those sheep free when I get home tonight.
    Send ’em over in my direction. I was born to herd.

  33. Sebastian,
    Try some Compound W or DuoFilm. In the meantime, just ignore the other kids when they tease you.

  34. With a name like Sebastian Holsclaw I’m well used to schoolyard teasing. 🙂
    “Wow, Sebastian, you’re handsome!”
    Thanks, 15-20 hours a week of volleyball helps. Though not recently, darn Achilles tendon. 😉

  38. Sebastian: Thanks, 15-20 hours a week of volleyball helps. Though not recently, darn Achilles tendon. 😉
    I really hope you haven’t tried darning your Achilles tendon… 😉
    Sorry to hear your ankle’s still not right. What other kinds of exercise are you trying? After a problem with my hip made me give up jogging (which I enjoyed, dammit!) I was doing yoga regularly. I found that (if I was careful) it actually seemed to be good for my hip. YMMV.

  39. SHiba Inu: yes. My two Bad Dogs were half Shiba, half coyote: a very, very bad mix. SHibas are working dogs, independent, aloof, serious predatory instinct. They should be trained very young, or else they can be hostile and bad. And, I would add, they should not be bred with coyotes, unless you want an absolutely untrainable, vicious, but gorgeous dog. Although mine were devoted to me; the viciousness was a combination of fear and a compulsion to protect me from the entire rest of the world, who were, according to them, my enemies.
    Picture: this one is pretty characteristic, but you have to ignore the cloying text and, worse, music.

  40. Forgot to add: Shibas are related to Akitas, and look like them, but are smaller and less muscle-y.
    As a Dlamatian, I am supposed to be intelligent, affectionate, loyal, and willful. Tee hee.
    And Sebastian: sorry about your ankle.

  43. Hmm…I did it again, filling everything out the same except claiming to be male. This time I came out as a Polish lowland sheepdog…Not sure what that means, except that I have too much time on my hands this evening.

  46. Ibizan Hound, well they sure look cool. Also, please keep in mind fellow posters that the Podenco Ibicenco is “extremely sensitive with acute hearing and must never be shouted at (…) rarely fights and responds to kind treatment” :).

  47. Australian Shephard as in
    GENERAL APPEARANCE: The Australian Shepherd is a well-balanced dog of medium size and bone. He is attentive and animated, showing strength and stamina combined with unusual agility. Slightly longer than tall, he has a coat of moderate length and coarseness with coloring that offers variety and individuality in each specimen. An identifying characteristic is his natural or docked bobtail. In each sex, masculinity or femininity is well defined.
    CHARACTER: The Australian Shepherd is intelligent, primarily a working dog of strong herding and guardian instincts. He is an exceptional companion. He is versatile and easily trained, performing his assigned tasks with great style and enthusiasm. He is reserved with strangers but does not exhibit shyness. Although an aggressive, authoritative worker, viciousness toward people or animals is intolerable.

  50. i am a briard (cool french (coincidence) dog used to keep the muttons). Lovely but with maybe too many hairs…

  51. Well i couldn’t get the test to work…the tart button never appeared…..but I have a lot in common with my dog. He’s a pug.

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