by hilzoy
Another homage to The Editors, below the fold, to spare people on dialup.
*** Now with updated, extra kittens!
The President already met with this kitten.
This kitten is a media whore.
This kitten is being used by far left elements who object to our way of life.
This kitten is a morbid mascot of convenience.
I can’t imagine Army Spc. Casey Sheehan would approve of this kitten.
This kitten is the media darling now; but this will backfire into long months of deepening sorrow and rage that will not be easily overcome.
This kitten is actively seeking to humiliate her (and our) Commander-in-Chief.
I hope this kitten fries in the Texas heat.
The company these kittens are keeping is dubious, relentless and interested in embracing something quite different than democracy.
This kitten is in serious need of some real public humiliation, involving being held immobile in an uncomfortable position, not in a discreet prison far away like Abu Ghraib, but in public — in, say, Times Square, while rotten cabbages are thrown at her.
I have no use for this kitten.
Can’t. See.
Eyes. Burned. Out.
So. Cute!
…and. EVIL!
Great, a fresh cute kitten thread –
now this post will never be read.
Fabulous links, hilzoy. A tour de force post!
Double kitten threads demand double posts, even if I am a dog person.
So cute. So unbearably cute.
It’s all so clear to me now. I mean, I’d read all the news reports, but they just weren’t cute enough for me to understand. Bless you, hilzoy.
hilzoy, you are taking this to the next level. We are not worthy.
I hadn’t actually clicked on the links… *covers eyes*
Yes, yes, but what about the puppies?
You do not want to click on this link to Brad DeLong’s blog.
Wow… great bit. Love the kittens. Love the story line.
Probably just an oversight…
…but you forgot to mention that This kitten thinks a cabal of neo-cons, Zionists, and oil-hungry coporate robber barons murdered her son to line their pockets with blood money -- all while making the world safe for Jew dominance, t…
I hope that this kitten fries in the Texas heat!
Ted: Oh. My God.
Must update.
Cute kittens 🙂
OT: you had a spammer you might want to remove.
Thanks, CMatt: all gone now 😉
Then there’s this kitten. At least this one comes with a photo.
classic.
I don’t believe this kitten loved her son.
Jeez, Ted, you’re doing exemplary work, but I don’t know how you stand it. You know, at least the guys who put on scuba-suits to clean filters at the sewage plants get double-time over-time pay. And you have to wade through all this human filth for free?
Oh dear. Cute kittens, but sick people on the other end of those links.
Today’s conservative fallacy: the undistributed middle (also similar to subrational association):
1. Cindy Sheehan thinks her son died for a lie.
2. David Duke thinks Cindy Sheehan’s son died for a lie.
3. Therefore, Cindy Sheehan is like David Duke.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go brush my tooth.
The only thing you could possibly have done to improve this post would have been to make the Protein Wisdom kitten’s description a bit more dramatic, self-aggrandizing, and conscious of its own unmatched combination of literary brilliance, humor, and pithiness. So, instead of just
“This kitten is a morbid mascot of convenience”
we could go with
“This kitten is a ghoulish talisman, a fetid, decaying gargoyle symbolizing the bipartite viral nature of the Left: for it is both obsolete and irrelevant, the ideological smallpox of post-Cold War America; while at the same time, its dogged insistence on maintaining a symbiotic relationship with the cancer of Islamofascism ensures its continued ability to threaten the utter destruction of all the freedoms it claims to hold so dear.”
Other than that, I’d say pretty damn awesome. Amazingly so, even.
Walter: thanks. I think I was influenced by the fact that, ever since I read the Protein Wisdom post, I had been looking at my cats, at odd moments, and saying: hey, morbid mascot of convenience! (I went through a similar phase after watching Forbidden Planet for the nth time a few years back, when I had dogs, when I trained them to come to “Monsters! Monsters from the Id!” (said in a nice tone of voice, of course.)
(‘Come’ was the only command they could ever be trained to, alas. But that’s another story.)
Hee. After a while, I got my friend’s cat to respond to “football kitty”, a reference to the shape of this wonderfully affectionate cat who was nevertheless undaunted by the prospect of a sessile life.
I had a dog once. I named him Stay.
“Come, Stay. Come!”
The Power of Cute Compels You
Can you’re mind withstand the cuteness of Left-Wing Kittens?
Can you resist the pull to the dark side?!?
Seriously, look at your own peril.
Come, Stay. Come!
My great-grandfather raised and sold terriers in a small town in southern Iowa. Called ’em all “Dog” so the people who bought them could name them. I always remember the time one of them had its nose in where it didn’t belong and he snapped “Dog!” in that tone that tells the dog it is in deep doo-doo with the lord and master. Every terrier within earshot cowered…
lookie at Walter, pickin’ up friends wherever he can!
I’m proud of you, Walter! Huzzah!
The State of the Debate on the War
Kittenpimps. “I can’t imagine Army Spc. Casey Sheehan would approve of this kitten.” “The contented purrs of these kittens, which make for effective media theatre, also make for standard radical anti-war verbiage.” “this kitten thinks a cabal of neo-co…
Howdy from Damascus, where the denizens of this fine internet cafe probably think I’m totally insane.
Yo, praktike! How’s tricks?
Adorable. Very imaginative and unique. Should be a regular feature.
Can I ask a serious question?
I understand that Jeff at Protein Wisdom is supposed to be cited approvingly as one of the real examples of a humorous blogginator on the right.
I then saw this “reply”, as it were, to the traitorous kitten posts from hilzoy and The Editors.
So the humorous premise of the kitten posts is that the first thing you see is an AWWWWW cute kitten. You then read the text below the picture like “This kitten is a full-scale Jew-baiting Moonbat” (with a link to relevent wingnut article making the statement about Cindy instead of kittens). The juxtaposition makes the already nutty text sound extra ridiculous and thus making Teh Funny.
The point being that they are trying to show how hyperbolic all this sounds. They show you just how silly it sounds by replacing Cindy with a “kitten”.
So a response one would expect from the right would be to use the same exaggerated humor about a similar incident where the left made equally hyperbolic statements about a analogous person advocating for a conservative position. An example might be something a liberal blogger said about Shiavo’s parents. I may not laugh, but I would hope I could at least appreciate the attempted retort with a “touche, mon ami” (being a liberal gay frenchie and all).
However, this “retort” we get from Jeff is to synthesize a blobby mash of poorly attributed “quotes” that Cindy has supposedly made and put a picture of a kitten above them. Perhaps realizing that something is amiss Jeff goes back to the drawing room and photoshops an islamofascist hat onto the kitten. This apparantly adds “Teh Funny” to said blogpost.
So if I understand correctly, the humor is that the kitten REALLY IS an islamofascist sympathizer. HAHA liberal scallywags! Have at ye!
Am I missing something or is this the paragon of wingnut comedy?
(posted also at thepoorman and jeff’s blog)
Those kittens clearly . . . HATE FREEDOM! (And flea collars.)
So let me get this straight – the United States government took the only secular country in the Middle East and turned it into an Islamic republic? The United States government installed and supported Saddam Hussein for decades; the same goes for Osama bin Laden. It’s been 1,435 days since President Bush said he’d catch bin Laden dead or alive. Our government lied to start an illegal, pre-emptive war of conquest. The “we are fighting them there so we don’t have to fight them here” argument is going to look pretty stupid after the next staged terrorist attacks. If you support the war in Iraq, what are you still doing here? Go defend Israel and big oil: 1-800-USA-ARMY. USA! USA! USA!
The True Face of the Pro-Kitten Left
After 9/11, America discovered that The Left loves only three things: 1. Osama bin Laden 2. Saddam Hussein 3. Kittens The prime offenders are obviously The Editers at The Poormen—along with their henchman Hizloy of Obsidian Blings. Every post they…
The True Face of the Pro-Kitten Left
After 9/11, America discovered that The Left loves only three things: 1. Osama bin Laden 2. Saddam Hussein 3. Kittens The prime offenders are obviously The Editers at The Poormen—along with their henchman Hizloy of Obsidian Blings. Every post they…
The True Face of the Pro-Kitten Left
After 9/11, America discovered that The Left loves only three things: 1. Osama bin Laden 2. Saddam Hussein 3. Kittens The prime offenders are obviously The Editers at The Poormen—along with their henchman Hizloy of Obsidian Wangs. Every post they…
The True Face of the Pro-Kitten Left
After 9/11, America discovered that The Left loves only three things: 1. Osama bin Laden 2. Saddam Hussein 3. Kittens The prime offenders are obviously The Editers at The Poormen—along with their henchman Hizloy of Obsidian Wangs. Every post they…
The True Face of the Pro-Kitten Left
After 9/11, America discovered that The Left loves only three things: 1. Osama bin Laden 2. Saddam Hussein 3. Kittens The prime offenders are obviously The Editers at The Poormen—along with their henchman Hizloy of Obsidian Wangs. Every post they…
The True Face of the Pro-Kitten Left
After 9/11, America discovered that The Left loves only three things: 1. Osama bin Laden 2. Saddam Hussein 3. Kittens The prime offenders are obviously The Editers at The Poormen—along with their henchman Hizloy of Obsidian Wangs. Every post they…
wiclked
hey mr or miss my cats name is mistchif and he looks just like that blackish striped cat but as he grew he looked sick then he died shortly after or thats what we think. well thats all for now. sinserily :annamotz
absolutely adorable they are so innocent and their eyes are so big and cute!!!!!!!!!!
i think that your need to be that rude to say those things about cats. you must not like cats, or you have a serius problem.
do you have any care about animals? and dont say you do inless you like ALL animals.
oh and i hope you burn in the texas heat u cow!!
stupid, rude, and mean, mean, mean, people
STUIPID PEOPLE_you hate cats i hate you
stupid, rude, and mean, mean, mean, people
STUIPID PEOPLE_you hate cats i hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I wish these kittens were all mine not even chistina the dumb person all mine no one else just me and my boyfriend Erik Hicken the hottest guy in school o and by the way i live in kamas down by heber so u can come hunt me down buttholes i hate your guts so go skure a cow and my phone number is 435-783-2157 and ask for brianna lambert buttholess love u lots brianna (i dont really love u fuckers so go suck your balls all u gay wods out there ha ha laugh out loud witch is lol bitchis ass holes by brianna lambert)
I wish these kittens were all mine not even chistina the dumb person all mine no one else just me and my boyfriend Erik Hicken the hottest guy in school o and by the way i live in kamas down by heber so u can come hunt me down buttholes i hate your guts so go skure a cow and my phone number is 435-783-2157 and ask for brianna lambert buttholess love u lots brianna (i dont really love u fuckers so go suck your balls all u gay wods out there ha ha laugh out loud witch is lol bitchis ass holes by brianna lambert)